Voices from Vietnam

“I was born in a small village along the Mekong Delta…I never knew I was gay until I was 23, in college, when I accessed the internet for the first time in Saigon…”

"The future? The way I see it you have two alternatives: get married to a real woman, or marry a lesbian..."

“The pédé group came through our village once a year. They were dressed in women's clothing. And men’s clothing. They were strange and dirty. A big band would play and they would sing and dance in a show. I didn’t know who they were or where they came from, but I knew that they were not to be approached…”


“It was a group from of Vietnamese men from the United States who started the website. They wrote in Vietnamese, and it was there that I read about gay people. When a few of them came to visit for Tet I went to meet them at a big hotel. It was the first time I had met a gay person...”

“I think I will marry someday soon. I want to start a family, and if I like the person then it does not matter to me whether they are a man or a woman, you know? It is the family that is most important. My parents, my children. I am just so worried that I will make it a sad life for my wife. I do not know if I would tell her...”

“I came to this bar every week for many years. It is the only one, and I knew everyone. Everyone knew everyone…”

“Even though I have a boyfriend for two years, I still go to the [gay] sauna - not to do anything, just to be around other people like me. I feel like I could do anything here, that I am totally free. And the funny thing is I don’t do anything special, just talk, swim, relax - but it is so important to me.”

"I thought I could come back and, you know, get on with my real life. But now I'm just counting the days until I go back to Bangkok. I need to be free, you know? I need a girlfriend. I need love."

"No, I would never go live in Thailand. I am Vietnamese - I love my country; I'm proud of my culture. This is where my friends are, my family. What could be more important than that?"